Soccer ball.

It's been a while since I've had something to post on here. I'd sort of forgotten about it. But in moving to a new house, we've lost a handful of things to Torg the Destroyer. He ripped open a bag of outgrown baby clothes--twice (he ate most of the bag the first time)--and was just generally an idiot for our last month or so in the old house.

He's settled in surprisingly well at the new house. But yesterday he got a bug up his butt and went after the tree, destroying an ornament (which I didn't take a picture of before we tossed it) and attempting to destroy another one before Kevin stopped him.

But the biggest casualty so far this week has been the soccer ball we got Lorelai for Christmas.



He's obsessed with ripping the hexagons off of soccer balls. This is the second soccer ball he's done this to. The other one was destroyed beyond usability.

Here's hoping having a fenced yard to run around in will help get some of this energy out.

Remind me again why I wanted a dog?

This used to be the centerpiece on my dining room table. (And a bag of felt and jingle bells to make the dog a collar for Christmas photos.) (He only ate one of the jingle bells, surprisingly. That will be an interesting walk in a few days.)



This was also part of my centerpiece.



This was a brand-new bag of cough drops that was not even IN the dining room, but is now ground into my dining room carpet because when you mix them with dog slobber they get super sticky and gross.

I left him for 30 minutes. THIRTY MINUTES. He's been good for up to an hour lately, and was so good all morning I thought I'd reward him.

Bad idea.


Bad dog.

Sigh.

Penguin

Damn idiot dog ate ANOTHER toy in the 15 minutes Lorelai was in the bathtub, because he was pissed that he didn't have my undivided attention. Which he never gets ANYWAY because I have a TODDLER and what is going to happen when I also have a NEWBORN in roughly six months?




I think the thing that frustrates me most about this is that I never catch him in the act, so I can't punish him. When someone does something that makes me so mad I cry, I want to be able to let them know they've done wrong. And I can't do that because dogs are too dumb to remember that they are the ones who ripped up yet another toy less than 10 minutes ago. So I end up yelling ineffectually at the ceiling instead of being able to spray-bottle him or something. Which may be why I get so mad I cry when he pulls crap like this.

Owl hat

This cute owl hat, which is brand new and which Lorelai has yet to actually wear, used to have two complete ears with cute little tassels on them. He did this because e was mad that I locked him out of the room I sew in while I made a blanket for a friend's baby. Even though Kevin was upstairs calling for him to come play. He only wanted me, apparently. Sigh.

Pumpkin

It's a good thing we knew we were having kids and pets when we bought white sofas, so our expectations of unstained-ness have been low from the beginning.

Brain surgery

Dr. Torg needs to works on his finesse in the OR.

This is the face...

...of a dog who was left uncrated for 30 whole minutes while I was out, and didn't destroy anything!




Good boy, Torg!